The Case for Kindness….

Imeboysn the Immortal words of Patrick Swayze from the classic film Road House (ok maybe classic is a stretch) “Be Nice…Until it’s time Not to be nice.”
Great advice, but it begs the question. When is it time not to be nice? When exactly is enough…enough? When do you have the Green Light not to be nice?
We see people making the decision to “not be nice” daily. Just think about the last time you were in traffic….especially when there is road construction going on, or a slow driver… the left lane. Or maybe in the drive thru when you have to do the dreaded “drive up and wait for your food”, even worse…..when your Netflix is being slow! Did you make the decision not to be nice one of those times?
Of course you did, we all do, and probably….most likely….more often than not… didn’t help at all. It probably didn’t make you feel any better, and it defintly didn’t make anyone else feel great either.
So the answer to when is it time “not to be nice” is……never. There is always a chance to smile, always time to breath and take a second to respond the right way, to push aside all those unhelpful things and to just be nice.
It doesn’t mean you can’t be honest, or genuine. Or that you have to be a door mat for people to walk all over.
It means that even when the answer is no, or when you have to relay bad news, or you are on the receiving end of some good old fashioned “ugliness” you can always be nice.
Kindness is the one commodity that increases the more its used. It is that secret ingredient that makes everything taste better. It is the invisible beauty product that gives your face and your personality just a little more glow. It is the medicine that heals in a way that is hard to see, but easy to feel. It is the gift that makes the giver and the receiver feel like they both got something priceless.
Not Convinced? Then I challenge you to take our 50 Day Kindness Challenge it is a simple program, its free, and if it doesn’t work we will triple refund you (did I mention its free). 
bookNeed More Help? Simply Download our free “50 Days” Book to get ideas and step by step instructions and challenges to reach 50 awesome acts of kindness.
What you will find is the power of simply being nice….to be nice, and you will feel the clam and peace that comes from letting go of all those “not to be nice” moments, and you might even help some one else do the same……

Presence over Presents

Presents are those things that shine until something else catches our eye, presence is the gift that will shine long after we are gone.

 Somewhere along the way we have tied love to possessions (look under a Christmas tree). Somewhere we tied how we measure love to the zeros on the price tags of those possessions (see engagement rings). Somewhere along the way we lost focus on presence and focused on presents.

One of the most vivid and painful memories of my youth was standing looking out the window in my living room waiting for my Father to show up for Christmas. He was a solider you see, stationed overseas, and Christmas was one of the few times I would see him. Minutes that seemed lives hours, turned into hours that seemed like days, and then the inevitable phone call and excuse why he wouldn’t be coming that day crushed me. It wasn’t the first time and would not be the last, and it wasn’t the missing presents that hurt me, it was the missing presence.

Presence however is not always a physical location, especially in this world of electronic distractions, busy schedules, political and economic stress. Presence is about make a real, visceral connection to the people in your life. Presence is an action word. It’s about being involved in the small things like cleaning your child’s runny noses for them, to big things like teaching them how to live by living a life of purpose for them.

Presence is however much harder to produce than presents sometimes, especially for men (What don’t you ladies do better than us that doesn’t involve picking up heavy things?) It requires a person to have a strong sense of who they are, what the believe in, and the courage to put those guiding principles into action.

If you are having trouble turning your “presence into a present”, or if you need help turning your good intentions into real actions I urge you to try our 50 days to change your life with simple kindness challenge. It is designed to stretch you out of what is comfortable, and into what is wonderful. Don’t just try it, live it for 50 days and it will be impossible not to be unchanged, touched, and closer to your self and those around you.

A portion of all of our proceeds will go towards funding our special needs martial arts class, that is free to any child in our community with developmental disabilities. That contribution in and of itself is will help to provide not just an opportunity for a child who otherwise might not have the opportunity to train and benefit from the martial arts, but it affords kids and adults from our weekly classes the ability to come in and work with those children and learn the power of presence first hand.

-Joshua Page